Terrifying Fact Number Two, is that I’ve just watched Matt Smith carrying a flaming torch on screen. Oh, it’s for such a thrilling scene in Episode 12. Really and truly, magnificent and epic. A proper movie moment. But never mind that, it’s Matt carrying a FLAMING TORCH. Look, Matt’s lovely, he’s a magnificent, brand new, hilarious, heartbreaking, heroic Doctor — but the fact is, if that man walks into a room with a coffee then it’s only so long before you’re wearing it. No, really, clumsiest man on earth. He walks like he’s in a constant state of surprise at his own limbs. I remember when he turned up at a Worldwide meeting really early on, and the first thing he did was spill a cup of coffee over a rather lovely woman. Naturally she giggled, flushed and introduced her mother. (Ahh, life when you’re Matt ! I accidentally made eye contact with the same woman — she phoned the police and shot me in the face.) On the way out he apologised to a completely different woman for the coffee incident. “That was the wrong woman,” I said, as he went out the doors. “Nope,” he replied, “That was the second cup.”
Oh, and there was the top secret, very special, extra readthrough for Episode 10 (I’m talking that up, but what the hell) and Matt came striding in with a GUITAR ON HIS BACK. I have honestly never seen a whole roomful of people flatten themselves against a wall with such a high-pitched squeal of terror. Except Karen, of course, who trotted along behind him without a care in the world. Oh, the horror as the Doctor spun and chatted and coffeed a series of delighted women. How that guitar arced and scythed! Swish! Get down, Karen! Swish! Karen, save yourself! Swish! Not her face, Matt, NOT HER FACE!! Ah, the memories. You know, to this day I’m not sure if Matt knew he had a guitar on his back — he might just have collided with a musician.
“You know, when you’re a kid, they tell you it’s all grow up, get a job, get married, get a house, have a kid and that’s it. But the truth is, the world is so much stranger than that. It’s so much darker…and so much madder…and so much better.”—Elton Pope - Love & Monsters, Doctor Who
“There’s rivalry between the Harry Potter fans and the Twilight fans. And Twilight fans think they’re much cooler than the Harry Potter fans. And I’m like, I dunno why, they’d all get their a** kicked by the Doctor Who fans.”—
1. tell me the truth, what made you start liking the person you like right now? 2. what on your body is hurting or bothering you? 3. what was your last thought before going to bed last night? 4. what are you listening to? 5. what’s something you’re not looking forward to? 6. where do you think your best friend is right now? 7. have you kissed anybody in the last five days? 9. kiss on the first date? 10. is there one person you want to be with right now? 11. are you seriously happy with where you are in life? 12. is there something you would like to say to someone? 13. what are three things you did today? 14. would you rather sleep at a friend’s or have them over? 15. what is your favorite kind of gum? 16. are you friends with any of your ex boyfriends/ girlfriends? 17. what is on your wrists right now? 18. ever liked someone you thought you didn’t stand a chance with? 19. does anyone have strong feelings for you? 20. are you slowly drifting away from someone? 21. have you ever wasted your time on someone? 22. can you do the alphabet in sign language? 23. how have you felt today? 24. you receive $60 without any reason, what do you spend it on? 25. what is wrong with you right now? 26. is there anyone you’re really disappointed in? 27. would you rather have starbucks or jamba juice right now? 28. why aren’t you in ‘love’ with your last ex anymore? 29. how late did you stay up last night and why? 30. when was the last time you talked to one of your best friends? 31. what were you doing an hour ago? 32. what are you looking forward to in the next month? 33. are you wearing jeans right now? 34. are you a patient person? 35. do you think you can last in a relationship for three months? 36. favorite color? 37. did you have a dream last night? 38. are you wearing jeans, shorts, sweatpants, or pajama pants? 39. if someone could be cuddling you right now, who would you want it to be? 40. do you love anyone who is not related to you?
‘Fat’ is usually the first insult a girl throws at another girl when she wants to hurt her.
I mean, is ‘fat’ really the worst thing a human being can be? Is ‘fat’ worse than ‘vindictive’, ‘jealous’, ‘shallow’, ‘vain’, ‘boring’ or ‘cruel’? Not to me; but then, you might retort, what do I know about the pressure to be skinny? I’m not in the business of being judged on my looks, what with being a writer and earning my living by using my brain…
I went to the British Book Awards that evening. After the award ceremony I bumped into a woman I hadn’t seen for nearly three years. The first thing she said to me? ‘You’ve lost a lot of weight since the last time I saw you!’
‘Well,’ I said, slightly nonplussed, ‘the last time you saw me I’d just had a baby.’
What I felt like saying was, ‘I’ve produced my third child and my sixth novel since I last saw you. Aren’t either of those things more important, more interesting, than my size?’ But no – my waist looked smaller! Forget the kid and the book: finally, something to celebrate!
I’d rather they were independent, interesting, idealistic, kind, opinionated, original, funny – a thousand things, before ‘thin’. And frankly, I’d rather they didn’t give a gust of stinking chihuahua flatulence whether the woman standing next to them has fleshier knees than they do. Let my girls be Hermiones, rather than Pansy Parkinsons.
she is the most brilliant person ever LETS ALL BE HERMIONES
“I solemnly swear that even though The Hunger Games may burst into this giant franchise that people all over the world love, I will still love it for what it is and for what this fandom has made it for me.”